the video

The fact that my phone stand had broken earlier in the day made the task just a bit harder. I was applying for a job, and in addition to my resume the company requested a video in which I answered questions about my self and the position.

Should I count the number of ways this ask would be easier for men than for women?

No, I’ll just let you think of them yourself.

After my morning exercise, I showered and then took the time to use my hair dryer, giving myself my best attempt at a blowout instead of using my typical air-dry method. Following my moisturizer, I applied makeup, which I rarely do these days. I listened to music and sang along, putting myself in a good mood.

Once I felt I had taken care of my appearance, I turned my attention to the questions. I had already sketched out my basic answers to each one but now it was time to pull the thread of my thoughts. This part required a lot of revision as I read my answers out loud to avoid tripping over them while recording.

With my answers prepared, I changed into a nice shirt over my pj pants — hey, a girl’s gotta be comfortable. I couldn’t find the video recorder app on my laptop and just wanted to get the process over with, so I decided to use my phone. The metal ring attached to the back of my phone had broken off earlier in the day, so I didn’t have a kickstand for it to hold it level. I stacked assorted books and notebooks together, creating a makeshift platform, and then worked on the angle.

At some point in the middle of this process, my smaller teenage cat awoke from his slumber and decided he wanted attention. He hopped into my lap at my desk with a loud “meow!” startling me and making me laugh while covering me with his fur. I patted him for a few minutes until he got bored and ventured off for a bite to eat, at which point I resumed my work.

During my first attempt at recording, I got distracted and hit the stop button pretty quickly. A piece of hair was hanging over my forehead in a weird way, and I visibly reacted to it — I know because the phone video was in selfie mode, and I saw it happen. So I laughed at myself and started over.

All in all I think there were between 4 and 5 takes. When I reached the final question, I looked at the time stamp and saw I was clocking in at about 3 minutes. The limit was 5, so if I had anything else to say I had plenty of time to do it. Instead I fumbled ahead of me and hit “stop.”

As I did so, a spurt of gunfire erupted.


I live within a mile of a sportsmen’s club, and it’s not unusual to hear the sound of its members firing at clay targets or whatever else they use. In fact, I go past the club every day on my walks and don’t react to the noise at all. There are signs posted along the perimeter of the woods, warning people that they will be entering a live-fire area if they disobey the “no trespassing” signs and walk off the road.

In the end, I didn’t re-watch the video. I just sent it. Hopefully I don’t make any silly or unflattering faces while speaking, but the answers are legitimately mine and heartfelt. I guess, when you think about it, the faces are too. If the shooting sounds made it into the last few seconds, that could boost my intrigue and therefore my candidacy. Right? I sure hope so.

Published by elleebeee

smiles. sarcasm. Springsteen.

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